Things to note:
1) Vax is again the one to notice how agitated Percy is,
confront him, and try to talk him down.
2) Vex checks Percy only once, at 1:42:51, when she thinks
he might be far out of line. Even that is very gentle, and she mostly lets it
go. Otherwise, everything she says is either to defend or encourage Percy. She’s
not nearly as warm towards everyone else. There’s a long pattern of this, and
it’s probably why Percy started listening to her more than anyone else in the
first place.
3) Where Percy usually presents himself as arrogant, here
his professed thoughts are steeped in doubt. His self-loathing is refracting his view
of his core self through all his mistakes and all the terrible people he’s known,
making himself complicit in every action and unintended outcome. Once
he’s in that headspace he’s repeating old patterns of working on destructive
ideas. It’s important to remember that prior to Ep66, Ripley’s last mention was
Ep57 1:47:38 when Victor told him she’d bought twelve hogsheads of black powder,
and that he was so distraught he cast Hex on himself later that night (2:05:12), the only time in the stream he’s directly self-harmed.
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Transcript method notes: http://otdderamin.tumblr.com/post/153539301510/a-note-on-my-transcription-method
Scene runs: 1:36:46 to 1:46:05 https://youtu.be/Z7ozVxDtJzM?t=5806
Liam: “Wait!
So, way faster than the casino trip, while we’ve been waiting so long,
Percival’s been acting fucking twitchy since we found that body, so I walk over
to him sitting off at a table.”
Vax: “Hey,
Mr. Cule as- Cool As A Cucumber.”
Vex, laughing
under her breath: “Cute as a cucumber…”
Vax: “Shush!
Shush! Or come with me, come have a seat.”
Vex: “Okay,
alright, I’m here.”
Vax: “What’s
the matter? Yeah, it’s her again. We’re going to find her. It’s fine. You’re
huffing and hawing since we found her body. It’s fine. What’s going on?”
Percy: “I
just- I hoped-” He’s quiet for a long time looking down holding his head
in one hand. Dejectedly, “I was really just hoping she was going to go
away. That’s all. I was really just hoping she was just going to go away.”
Vax: “Well,
she’s going to go away, Percival. If not now, later.”
Percy:
“Every second she’s alive is untold damage to the world. She is- Do you
know how every now and then I say something just
awful?”
Vex: “Mmhm.”
Vax nods.
1:37:51 Percy
grins: “I love you both very much for that.” Earnestly, “When I
think of that terrible person inside of me, I see her face. She has a very
active imagination. She knows how to make these machines. And her imagination
terrifies me. If you knew that that was me, would you let me live? If she made
ten more of these things, if she made a hundred? Does she just hand them out to
people? Maybe- I don’t know, maybe she’s just running around and torturing
people’s parents and siblings to death and then handing them a gun and kicking
them out into the world to see what will happen because it could be funny.”
Vax, intensely
but trying to calm him: “You’re probably right, Percival. She probably is.
This is not Lord and Lady Briarwood over again, though.”
Percy: “No,
it’s not.”
Vax: “And
you’re not alone.”
Percy: “No,
I’m not.”
Vax, pointing to
himself, Vex, then Keyleth: “You have me. You have her. You have her. You
have the other two Laurel and Hardy motherfuckers who aren’t back yet.”
Percy, covering
his eyes: “I just-” Looks up searchingly at the ceiling. “I was
so hoping that maybe…” He sighs.
Marisha: “I
slam some mead in front of him.”
Percy:
“Thank you. I was just hoping something heavy had fallen on her from a
great height, saving the world- a few thousand lives.” He takes a hard
swig from the tankard.
Vex: “Well,
we’re going to be above her. Maybe we can be the one to drop something heavy.”
Percy:
“That’s really what I’m hoping.”
Keyleth:
“Oh, I’ve been practicing that, actually. I can be really heavy.”
Percy: “That
may help.”
Keyleth: “Yeah.”
1:39:31 Percy:
“And I- She is the biggest mistake I’ve made. And I’m horrified at who has
paid the price.”
Vax: “All
the more reason for you to be the same cold-hearted asshole you’ve been for the
last year. Why change now? Get the job done, Percy.”
Percy: “I’m
counting to a hundred. I’ll be fine.”
Keyleth:
“It’s not very often we see you shaky, Percy.”
Percy: “Once
we’re out of here, I’ll feel fine. Once that thing is off my machine I’ll feel
fine. And I’m thinking of something else, and I’m thinking of building something
awful to help deal with her.”
Keyleth:
“Hang on, hang on, wait, wait, hang on. Because I was just about to ask if
you ever have regrets of building something awful and releasing it into this
world and now you just said you’re going to double down, essentially?”
1:40:21 Percy,
sounding increasingly haunted: “I’ve been thinking long and hard about it.
I think, inevitably, any time I think of something it might just be too late. I
think I’m going to be very careful about what I build. I’m going to be very
careful about where it goes. And I’m also going to ask anybody, if I ever- when
I die- destroy everything. Please? This is why I don’t write down notes. Any of
my sketches, they’re put away, and they’re put in a place where I can remove
them once the job is done. But I sketch my idle thoughts, and right now I’m
having an idle thought for her, and- it’s simple, it’s nothing complicated,
it’s just vicious.”
Vax: “Alright,
well, we can do that. We can destroy anything you make. But for now, Percy,
keep your head, man.”
Percy: “One
night of sleep, I’ll be there.”
Keyleth:
“What exactly are you thinking of making? Because- Just because we can
destroy your notes, you’re still alive and your gun still got into the
world.”
Vex: “Regardless
of what he makes, who wields it? Fenthris is a horrible weapon wielded by a
horrible being before I had it. A gun can do the same thing.”
Keyleth:
“You’re arguably one of the greatest minds in existence right now,
Percival.”
Percy: “That’s
a terrible thought.”
Keyleth:
“But you are. And Vex isn’t wrong.”
1:41:52 Percy:
“I know. There are things- There are things that one day I will speak of
that I’m not- I’m not really ready to deal with yet. But I think I may even have
something that could help us with the dragons. I have a thought. I’m going to
work on it on our way to the island.”
Vax: “Now
I’m nervous.”
Percy: “It
will be something that once the dragons are felled I plan on destroying immediately
after. And I think you’ll be alright with it when you see it. It’s too
complicated for any one person to really deal with. But I will feel much better
if she is in the ground.”
Vex: “Now
I’m interested in seeing it.”
Keyleth:
“Percy, you know you can talk to us, right? You never share ideas with
us.”
Percy: “I
do. I told you my idea of killing all the dragonborn to start a war between the
dragons.”
Keyleth,
hesitantly: “Alright, well…”
1:42:48 Percy:
“That’s why I don’t share those ideas. I’m not proud of them.”
Vex: “Is
this thing you’re building going to kill a lot of people in addition to the
dragon?”
Percy: “I
hope not. But it could. It could make it very easy to kill a lot of
people.”
Vax: “One
day at a time, gang. Let’s deal with Ripley first.”
Percy:
“Let’s deal with Ripley. Let’s collect a few more things that will help us
deal with… home. Let’s save home. And then I will spend some good time undoing
some of the damage that I’ve done. I should have killed her. I should
have.”
Keyleth:
“You shouldn’t feel regret about not taking another person’s life. That’s
a moment of humanity.”
1:43:38 Percy: “It
wasn’t. I was not being kind. I was being selfish. I didn’t kill her because
the Briarwoods mattered more to me. Even though I knew, I knew, she was far more dangerous. That if they had escaped, the
world would be darker, two more vampires or whatever, but she was really- she
was the genie and I knowingly and very willingly said I’m fine with that. And I
knew at that moment, this was not a thought I had later, I in my head went,
‘She is going to kill hundreds of people, and that’s okay right now.’”
Vex: “Percy?
If you had stayed with her and let the Briarwoods go, a god, a terrible god
would probably be loosed on the land right now. I think you chose
correctly.”
Percy: “I
think I stumbled into the correct answer. I’m not sure I chose correctly. I
think I got lucky.”
Keyleth:
“Did you not want to kill her because in a way you feel responsible for
who she is?”
1:44:34 Percy:
“Oh, I feel absolutely responsible for inspiring a maniac. Of course I
do.”
Keyleth:
“You didn’t.”
Vax: “Look,
we’re going to help you get to her. You’re gonna get her. You’ve got to let us
in on it a bit, though. Alright?”
Percy: “I’ll
show you- Once I have something drawn I’ll show you what it is.”
Vax:
“Alright.”
Percy: “I’ll
have something drawn by tomorrow.”
Vax: “That’s
a promise?”
Percy: “That
is absolutely a promise.”
Keyleth:
“Also, I know you’re really smart, but we’re smart too. Don’t insult our intelligence
by assuming we can’t comprehend one of your ideas.”
1:45:04 Percy:
“Oh no, you’ll comprehend it. It’s not that I don’t think you can
comprehend it; I know you can. It’s that I know what it says about me that I even
thought it.”
Keyleth: “Percy.
Peerrcy!”
Percy, with a
grin: “You’ve been drinking.”
Keyleth: “I
have!”
Vex: “Oh, Keyleth,
really, hold off on the alcohol. We have a lot to do today.”
Percy: “Hold
on, hold on.” He takes Keyleth’s tankard away, and drinks it instead.
Keyleth:
“We’ve been through so much! We’ve been through so much!”
Vax:
“Alright, I think my point has made.”
Percy: “Your
point has been made.”
Liam: “I
start moving Keyleth towards the door for some fresh air.”
Vex: “Please.
Get her some water.”
Keyleth: “I just-
I wan’ mor’ mead!”
Vax: “C’mon,
c’mon, c’mon.”
Percy: “I’m
sorry I’m an idiot.”
Keyleth: “I
love you! But I hate you. But I love you.”
Percy: “I’m
fond of you as well.”
1:45:42 Vex:
“Percy?”
Percy: “Yes,
dear?
Vex: “You’re
a better man than you believe.”
Percy: “Thank
you. I accept that compliment. You as well. You’re a better woman than you
believe.” Pause, tone switches to teasing, “Doesn’t feel good, does
it? There you are!”
Vex: “No, it
doesn’t. Shit.”
Percy: “No!
That’s what you get for saying things like that. You’re a terrible
person.”
1:46:05